As we acknowledge and celebrate the rich history and contributions of African American people, I am personally inspired and encouraged to be a part of a race that has both endured and continues to be impactful today.  In this podcast, I talked about black history from a biblical perspective. 

It is my hope that you learn and are too encouraged by our rich heritage.

Listen on:  iTunes | BuzzSprout | Player FM

I’m going to show you why you shouldn’t assume that everyone wants to go straight up to heaven. I’m going to challenge one of the most popular assumptions in Christianity. We think that EVERYONE WANTS TO GO TO HEAVEN, but do they?

Heaven is the most coveted destination for most people

Heaven is the most coveted destination for most people. Not everyone is willing to do what God requires for us to get there. We don’t want to give up our sinful and worldly pleasures such as partying, accessive drinking, drugs, and every other perverted thing contrary to the Word of God.

For those of us who are disciples of Jesus Christ, it is what we look forward to so we can see Him face to face. Jesus is also the only way to get there, so we need to talk about Him. The Bible has a lot of great things to say about heaven and I will quote some of them here:

First, heaven is a place of rest. “There remains a Sabbath-rest for the people of God; for whoever enters God’s rest also rests from his own work, just as God did from his.” (Hebrews 4:9-10)

Second, heaven will be a place where we will be reunited with our loved ones who have gone before us. “And I heard a voice from heaven say, ‘Write: Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on.’ ‘Yes,’ says the Spirit, ‘they will rest from their labor, for their deeds will follow them.'” (Revelation 14:13)

Third, heaven is a place of beauty. “And I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more.” (Revelation 21:1)

Fourth, in heaven, we will be able to worship God without interruption. “And I saw no temple in the city, for its temple is the Lord God the Almighty and the Lamb. And the city does not need of sun or moon to shine on it, for the glory of God gives it light, and the Lamb is its lamp.” (Revelation 21:22-23)

Finally, heaven is a place where we will be able to experience perfect joy. “And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, ‘Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain

But what about everyone else? Do they all want to go to heaven?

I’m pretty convinced that most people don’t care about going to heaven. They are much more interested in their version of paradise right here on earth.

People love their creature comforts. They love their money, their luxury cars, their big houses, and their fancy clothes. They love to be entertained and to have fun. They love the attention they get from others. They may think that all they have to do is say a prayer or go to church on Sunday and that’s it. They’re good to go.

Now, I’m not knocking money or nice things. Those things can be great and God wants us to enjoy them! But when we put our hope in the things of the world, we set ourselves up for misery when they’re gone.

The Bible warns us of this over and over again:

“Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them.” (1 John 2:15)

“The one who loves his life will lose it, while the one who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.” (John 12:25)

“Jesus said to him, ‘If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.'” (Matthew 19:21)

I don’t think it takes a biblical scholar to figure out that we’re not supposed to set our hope on the world! Yet this line comes up over and over again – and we think we’re exempt! We’re smart, we’ve got our lives together, and we don’t cling to money or the things of the world. We’ll be fine.

So let me ask you: What makes you any different from the people I described earlier? If your hope is set on anything besides God Himself, then you’re putting that thing ahead of God’s plan for your life. And if you don’t believe me, ask yourself this question:

What would make a better story – the Lord coming back and taking all of His people to paradise with Him? Or the Lord coming back and finding us comfortably situated in our version of heaven right here on earth?

Which story would make people more excited? Which story would get more attention in the media?

The answer is obvious. We want to be comfortable. We don’t want to think about God coming back and judging the world. We’d rather just enjoy our lives as they are.

But that’s not what the Bible teaches. The Bible promises that at the end of our lives, we will either find ourselves in paradise with God or be separated from Him forever.

It’s a lot easier to write a check for the church building fund than it is to put things in their proper perspective. But when you consider what God has done for us and what He demands in return, giving to the church building fund doesn’t seem so bad after all.

Is it worth living a life without sin?

Ever since Adam and Eve ate the apple, people have been trying to live their life without sin. But how much is it worth? Is pleasing God what you want or need? This may seem like a foolish question but this point needs to be addressed. There is an old saying that goes

“If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.” And this rings true for everyone.

Too often, people put their faith in things that are not God. They trust in money, relationships, or their abilities. But at the end of the day, all of these things will let you down. Only God can provide what you need in life. He is the one who created you and knows what is best for you.

Don’t get me wrong, it is important to do good deeds and help others. But God should be our priority. We need to put our faith in Him and trust that He will guide us through life. Too often, people equate going to heaven with living a perfect life. But this is not the case. No one is perfect and God knows this. He is willing to forgive us for our sins, no matter what they are.

So the next time you are tempted to sin, remember that God is waiting for you with open arms. He loves you and wants you to come back to Him. Don’t worry about living a perfect life, just focus on your relationship with God. He will take care of the rest. However, we must remember that just because we have been given the grace of God it is not a license to continue to sin.

Sin will always take you further than you are willing to go and cost you more than you are willing to pay. So please stop assuming that everyone wants to go to heaven. It is not a given and it is not easy. But it is worth it.

What’s so bad about sin?

Sin is the act of breaking one or more of God’s moral laws.

Sin can be described as doing something that goes against what you know to be right and good in your heart. It could also mean purposefully avoiding God, His glory, or his will for your life. Sin usually has negative consequences on our relationship with Him and other people. And it can lead us away from God’s plan for our lives; which is why it needs to be avoided at all costs!

Many people believe that sin doesn’t matter because Jesus died on the cross for us and saved us from sinning again (which was necessary since we are all sinners). But while Jesus did take care of sin once-and-for-all, he didn’t free us from the consequences of sin. That’s why it’s important to avoid sinning in the first place!

Living a life without sin is not easy, but there is a great reward if we strive to do so. Jesus died on the cross for our sins, so we could be forgiven and have eternal life with Him. But we must remember that just because we have been forgiven for our sins does not mean we have a license to continue doing them.

We must choose to follow God’s teachings and live a life that reflects His glory and goodness. If you want to learn more about how God views sin, check out the Bible! It is full of great examples of people who went against their sinful nature to do what was right in God’s eyes. Even though they fell short at times, they continued to strive for righteousness.

Sin is essentially lawlessness

Sin is essentially lawlessness. When you break God’s laws or any law for that matter, it doesn’t just show a lack of respect for the rule maker but also for those who follow his rules. It’s like saying to them “I am more important than your needs.” Sin is not only harmful to others but also oneself because when people sin they are being disobedient and going against what will ultimately lead them to their salvation in heaven. In other words, when people sin they are making themselves unworthy of paradise.

If we want everyone in this world to go to heaven then we must stop assuming everyone wants there already and instead work on showing each person how much going there would mean by giving our full attention and love.

It’s not about convincing people that they need to go to heaven, it’s about convincing them that they want to go to heaven. Besides, it beats that alternative. Right?

Satan distracts us to focus on the here and now instead of preparing for eternity

The only way to go to Heaven is through Jesus. Period. It’s not about whether or not you are good enough for God, it’s about the truth that He has given us access through His Son, Jesus Christ. I hope this introduction can help you understand what it means to be saved and how your eternity depends on your response right now! We all deserve Hell because of our sin but there is a way out-Jesus! Let me share with you the good news that Jesus died on the cross so that we could have eternal life in heaven if we believe in Him!

People don’t miss out on heaven because of a behavior problem but because they reject God’s plan for salvation.

So many people are ignorant about the truth of Heaven and Hell. They think they can continue living their life any way they want no matter how bad it is and that they will still end up in Heaven. Satan distracts us to focus on the here and now instead of preparing for eternity. You don’t have to be good enough for God – He already loves us with everlasting love. All we need do is accept His Son’s sacrifice for our sin through faith, which means trusting Him as Lord and Savior!

5 ways people avoid the gospel

People don’t want to believe they’re sinners.

Many people don’t want to believe that they’re sinners because it’s difficult to accept that they’re not perfect. As a result, they try to rationalize and justify their sins to avoid having to deal with an internal reality that can be emotionally difficult. Sometimes we lie about sinning because we want to maintain the idea that we’re good enough for God.

By misrepresenting our sins, we make it difficult for others who are struggling with sin in their life. We also make it more difficult for people in a state of doubt to choose Christ honestly.

People don’t want to accept that they’re going to Hell if they die without Jesus

I’m sorry, but this is false. People DO want to accept death and the fate they deserve if it’s Hell.

The Bible says that “the wages of sin is death” (Romans 6:23), meaning that every person gets what he or she deserves. If you’re a sinner, you go to Hell. It’s as simple as that.

Many people don’t want to accept this because they want to justify their continued sinning or even worse – they think that THEIR GOOD DEEDS will get them into Heaven. But the Bible is clear: good deeds are no match for an abundance of bad deeds. “For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles in one point, he has become guilty of all.” – James 2:10

The good news is that no matter how many sins you have committed or how deep into sin you are, God sent his son Jesus to take on your punishment by dying for your sins on the cross. “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” – John 3:16

If you want to go to Heaven, all you have to do is believe that Jesus died for your sins and ask Him to forgive you. It’s that simple.

People think that going to Heaven is automatic
People always assume that they will go to Heaven because they are good people or that it is automatic. This is not the case. People think that they can just give money to charity, volunteer a little, or go to church on Sundays and they are good to go. The bible talks about those who questioned Jesus and stated we have cast out demons and done many wonders in your name. Jesus replied, “I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.” (Matthew 7:23)

You can do all the good deeds in the world, but if you do not have a relationship with Jesus Christ, you will not go to Heaven. It is as simple as that. Jesus said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” (John 14:6) People think they don’t need to go to church or read the Bible because they know Jesus. But how can you know Him if you don’t spend time with Him?

People think that going to Heaven is about works
People also think that going to Heaven is all about works. They think that if they do enough good things, God will let them into Heaven. This is not true either. The Bible says, “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.” (Ephesians 2:8-9) We are saved by grace, which is a gift from God. We cannot earn our salvation. It is something that we receive by faith.

People don’t want to let go of control and submit to God’s authority.
In a world where people are often trying to control their destiny, it can be hard for them to accept that they need help from God. Once they do, however, the rewards of spiritual fulfillment will be great. This is not about giving up control and submitting to God’s authority – it’s about acknowledging that we’re not in charge and letting Him take over! God is real and He will not steer you wrong.

People should really consider going to heaven
In conclusion, people should reconsider their decision of not wanting to go to heaven. Some people are misinformed about what Jesus has accomplished for mankind and that is our fault as Christians. As a result, many people may not fully understand what heaven is and the beauty and reward it is for those who have been faithfully serving Jesus. We could do a better job in our church communities and schools to teach these doctrines correctly and guide people accordingly.

Jesus is our Lord and savior and I just want to see people receive that salvation and be rewarded with everlasting life. Please, don’t let your preconceived notions of what heaven is like keep you from experiencing the reality of it. God bless.

Identity is the foundation on which we build our lives. Identity gets shaped by what others think of us, and it shapes how we think of ourselves.

If you want to live a free life, you need to stop worrying about what other people think about you—not just 80% or 90%, but 100%. And then take action based on what God thinks of you. When your identity is in Christ alone, there are no expectations for you to meet except His perfect standard of holiness. It doesn’t matter what people think about you because all that matters is who He says you are: His beloved child!

When our identity’s based on what other people think of us, we’re always in danger of their opinion changing.

When our identity’s based on who Christ says we are, no one can take that away from us. They might not like us, they might even hate us—but as long as we know who we are in Him, it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks about us.

So let go of your need for approval and start living the life God has called you to live!

It’s not your responsibility to make sure everyone likes you

Identity is a major concern for many people. We can define identity as the sense of self-worth that an individual has. It’s how you feel about yourself and your worth in society, which often comes from other opinions or feedback from others.

The problem with identity is that it relies on outside input to determine what you’re worth, instead of relying on God’s opinion of who you are. Identity should come from within rather than without, but because we live in a world where everyone judges and everyone wants recognition, it’s difficult to weed out all the noise and focus on the truth: God knows your true identity better than anyone else does because He created you! Regardless of what other people think about you or say about you, just remember that God has an expert opinion of you and that’s what should matter most.

With your identity, don’t worry about pleasing everyone because that’s impossible. Just focus on being the best version of yourself and let God take care of the rest. You can’t please everyone and that’s okay because God has created you the way He wants you to be, not how other people want or expect you to be. Identity is about being comfortable in your skin, which often comes from getting rid of negative thoughts and feelings towards yourself – something I dealt with throughout my life. Be confident in who God made you to be! Remember: It doesn’t matter what people think about you, just what God thinks!

You can’t please everybody, so don’t even try

Trying to please everyone will eventually wear you out. If you’re not careful, it will take all the joy out of what you do. It’s okay to please people sometimes, but if that is your primary goal in life, then I pray for God to have mercy on you because he knows it involved much stress and pressure from being a pleaser 24/365.

Trying so hard to fit into everybody else’s box can leave no room for who He created us to be. Don’t try so hard fitting in when trying so hard just makes it seem like something is missing or wrong with yourself-because nothing needs fixing! Be true to yourself and live peacefully knowing that God loves YOU more than any other person does!! A lot of times we go around looking for validation from others and forget that the only one who truly matters, thinks about us day and night, and has our best interest at heart is God himself.

When we find our identity in Christ, it doesn’t matter what people think about you anymore because it does not base your worth on their standard but Gods! So stay encouraged today to walk confidently into who he created you to be-no matter what anyone else says!!

Don’t forget: Psalm 139:13- For You formed my inward parts; You wove me in my mother’s womb. 14 I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, and my soul knows it very well. 15 My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth; 16 Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were all written The days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them. 17 How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How vast is the sum of them! 18 If I should count them, they would outnumber the sand. When I awake, I am still with you.

Don’t let people’s opinions affect your faith

In a world where people’s opinions often dictate their lives, it’s hard to ignore the opinion of other people. However, this is not a healthy way to live. We all look for inspiration, but sometime we can put too much stock into the opinions of other people, especially in our faith. No one has a perfect life and everyone makes mistakes. When you put your trust in other people, you are setting yourself up for disappointment because they will always, at some point, let you down. They are only human, right?

You are valuable

Another thing to remember is that you are valuable, no matter what anyone else says. Created you were in the image of God, so you have intrinsic worth. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise! Remember that God loved and valued you, and hold on to that truth tightly.

You are not alone

Last, remember that you are not alone. God is with you always, and he will never leave your side. So don’t be afraid to face the challenges of life, because you have the Lord by your side. You can do anything when you have God on your side!

Think about the people who have had a positive impact on your life

Why did one person have a positive impact on your life? What did they do that made you feel so good about yourself? There are many ways to be an inspiration to others, but sometimes it’s just because of something small. Maybe they always had a smile on their face, no matter what life threw at them. Or maybe they were always there to lend an ear and offer support, even when you didn’t think you needed it. No matter what it was, their positive influence helped you.

In school, we have many teachers who have had a big impact on our lives. The teachers that help us succeed and encourage us to explore new ideas can be just as important as family members or friends. When people around us are supportive of the things we do, it makes us feel like we can do anything.

It’s vital to select the time to acknowledge these individuals for all that they’ve done for us, and let them know how much we appreciate them. Sometimes a simple ‘thank you’ is all it takes to make someone’s day. So tell your favorite teacher just how much they mean to you!

Whether it’s a teacher, family member or friend, everyone can impact someone else. So take the time to be grateful for all that people do and let them know how much they mean to you. You never know when their positive influence will help you succeed.

Reflect on what God thinks of you and how he sees you

Most people take too much time and energy worrying about what others think of them. We hold unto the opinions of others on us like we own them and feel we need to justify ourselves to them.

Worrying, justifying, and striving to earn the approval of other people is a distraction from living life in peace and simplicity. It’s also a sign you’ve given up your authority over yourself. It’s difficult, but give it one day not seeking their opinion or trying to please them, even if it means being disliked by them. You might just find that they were just projecting their worries about themselves onto you all along, anyway! After one day, come back and evaluate how your feelings have changed because of this.

We have a God who is for us and loves you so much he gave his son to die on the cross for your sins! Who gives a fuck about what others think? You can’t please everyone anyway, just do what’s right by you and live with that peace of mind that comes from knowing someone else has already won your approval in heaven.

Conclusion:

It is important to not worry about what other people think of you. It’s also crucial to keep in mind that God loves and values you, no matter what anyone else says or does. Remember, there are plenty of positive influences all around us- teachers, family members, friends — who can help to help others succeed. Take the time to show gratitude for these individuals by acknowledging them when they do something nice for you!

Remember, God is with you always and that he values you. Never give up your authority over yourself, as it will only cause more anxiety for you in the long run. Try not to worry about what others think of you; instead focus on living a life at peace knowing someone else has already won your approval in heaven!

It doesn’t matter what people think about you, just God.

One day I was in my car driving to an unfamiliar destination. I looked at my phone and touched the screen to get a preview of the route I was on and my car was out of focus on the GPS screen. While using this app, I noticed there was a button in the lower left-hand side of my phone screen called re-center. I pressed the button on the app and immediately I was able to calibrate to my surroundings and proceeded to my destination.

This I thought to myself is a microcosm of our lives. oftentimes we find ourselves sidetracked, lost and going in the wrong direction with things that are insignificant to our destination and or destiny. I have learned, thank God it is not too late, that without a plan, vision or forethought to what you intend to accomplish with the few short days we have on this earth, we will wander aimlessly throughout life. Just as we use a GPS to help us get to one destination to another, vision is the GPS to getting our lives from a state of habitual daydreaming and present reality.

For most of us, we never have been exposed to re-centering our lives. We chase after whatever the latest trend is and we pursue it, even to the detriment of leaving our original intended purpose. We never take the time to discover our true purpose and destiny and the direction it takes to get there. We ask other people who if they were to be completely honest with you, they haven’t re-centered or discovered their own lives based on the vision God has given them. I don’t know about you, but I am ready to come to the intersection of Destiny Blvd and Opportunity Lane and make the correct turn according to the GPS for my life and be completely centered.

it is a worthwhile exercise to make sure that our lives are re-centered. We have to make sure we are on the route we should be traveling. We can’t look at another person course and determine that it is the one for us to travel on. Just like a plane of a particular airline may all look the same with their markings and paint job, they are traveling to different destinations. They each receive different coordinances to reach their destinations. If the pilot is off by just one degree, the plane will not reach its intended destination and at some point will have to recenter in order to correct the navigation mistake.

Let us take a hard look at what we are currently doing and the activities we are apart of and the people in our circles. Are these things constantly causing our internal GPS to say re-calibrating? Are we constantly hearing the GPS message” As soon as you can please make a legal U-Turn? Make just maybe we should stop, take note, and re-center

Maybe it is just me, but I have a difficult time not being in control. I like you have aspirations of a bright future and often times I find myself wanting to help God out, which is totally ridiculous. What I am learning is to trust His process. Sometimes in our daily lives, we can look at those around us and those in our peer groups and it seems as though they are growing at the speed of light. What I had to learn, and this might encourage you as well is that we all have different assignments and purposes that God intended when he created you and I. A.H. Strong states “When God wants to make an oak, he takes a hundred years, but when He wants to make a squash, he takes six months.” I am beginning to learn to trust, accept and embrace His process.

For most of us, God has us in the refiner’s process. refining involves removing impurities that remain after the smelting process. Just like the old gospel songs that say: Please be patient with me, God is not through with me yet. When God gets through with me I shall come forth as pure gold. We are often anxious and feel the demands chronological time, but what we must remember is that God is eternal and he does not operate within the confines of time. I honestly believe that for most of us we keep comparing ourselves to others and if we will be honest we doubt God’s ability to take care of us. Jeremiah 29:11 says “for I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

I am learning albeit slowly to enjoy life and take God at his word. God assures us that God also assures us that “for those who love God all things work together for good.” Romans 8:28. He will surely take care of you and I. God sees the bigger picture. He sees the purpose of every little detail in our lives. Whenever you start assuming or over-thinking details in your life, look to His promises. God tells us: For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord.“As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8-9

My friends, I am inviting you to take this courageous journey with me. I know that you are used to planning and orchestrating your day to day affairs and quite frankly maybe just maybe you are wearing yourself out. There is a time for everything. If God has called you to some endeavor and you are frustrated that it has not manifested, know that times of preparation and simmering are required before the vision can be achieved. Seldom does God call and manifest something at the same time. There is preparation. There is testing. There is relationship building between you and God that must take place. I believe that if we could ever get to a place where we let go and let God, we will be able to see on this side of heaven that losing control and allow God to be God was one of the best decisions we could have ever made

It was a hot sweltering mid-summer morning with the faintness hint of a breeze. The sun was rising rapidly and peaking through the crevices of the Venetian blinds that encased the oversized bedroom window. Although the alarm clock had sounded; it was the distinct and very familiar smell of pork bacon, grits, garlic toast, and cinnamon raisin pancakes the had awaken Kelvin a 6 foot2 inch , 190 pounds, clean cut, well groomed , athletically gifted, stoutly built, pecan tan brother up from his sleep in the king-sized, pillow top bed. As he flung back the embroidered monogrammed sheets and swung his size 11 feet onto the imported Italian marble floor; he traveled to the bathroom wiping the residue of the previous nights sleep from his hazel eyes.

As he made his way down the spiral stair case’ following the aroma of the food there in the kitchen wearing a lavender satin bathrobe that accentuated her figure while revealing just a hint of her shapely legs was Taryn his wife of twelve years of marriage that produced two children; fraternal twins named Aaron and Ashley. Her skin was Hershey chocolate brown, smooth and creamy without a flaw. She had big yet subtle brown eyes, the kind that when she would look at you seemed as though she could see into your soul. When she smiled her full but not oversized lips revealed her milky white teeth that rivaled the rays of sunlight that was dominating every room in their suburban home.

Although Taryn was an amazingly accomplished woman with a MASTER’S DEGREE IN FINE ART, her greatest joy came from being a wife and mother. She was totally committed to her family especially since she came from a broken family, her mother and father had divorced when she was age nine. She had remained close to both her parents, but by not having them in the same house she always felt there was a void; that only the two of them being together could fill. She had promised herself long ago that she would do whatever it took to provide her children with all the things that she lacked as a child emotionally and materially.

Kelvin always had aspirations of making his first million dollars be for the age thirty and at age 40 he had surpassed his goal many times over. He attended college on an athletic scholarship, but in his sophomore year, he suffered a torn Achilles tendon on his left foot. His love for sports motivated him to obtain a degree in sports medicine. He figured if he could not play anymore this would allow him to at least be near the action, besides he loved the comradary that sports offered.

Bomp! bomp goes the bass from flowing through the Bose audio speakers in the in the black EXTERIOR, black leather interior, chrome spinner rimmed BMW 745 ROLLING down Springfield avenue. In the driver’s seat sits Rico Taylor, a twenty-three-year-old street-wise brother that grew up on the mean fast paced streets of Newark, NEW JERSEY. He’s what you might call a high yellow complexioned brotha; THE pretty boy type. Wearing his hair faded closely with a razor sharp hair line. He wears a goatee; always dresses to impress with the latest urban fashions. He never knew his biological father, consequently he never had an authentic male figure in his life; a third generation of the love’m and leave’m syndrome. All of life’s lessons he LEARNED WAS from school; school of hard knocks that is. Rico is not your average streetwise dude. He is as intelligent as they come, and is definitely about upward mobility. He was the product of a teen pregnancy. his mother Kelly; a virgin of sixteen years old; while in her junior year of high school met what she thought was the love of her life. you know that proverbial teen age love affair. After much smooth talking and coercing, she finally relented and lost her innocence.